Follow the lemmings, she thought as she joined the hundreds of
commuters filing two by two down the stairs to exit the train station. Her whole life had been an adventure. She loved that her friends watched her,
bemused, to see what the next twist might be.
But now she who loved light, colour, and openness trudged between the tight
grey rows of skyscrapers.
At the
first red light, she looked around, determined not to succumb to the temptation
to stare at her phone and complete the transformation into “one of them”. It was a little defiance, but the only thing
she could do to keep her sense of self. On
the opposite corner, she noticed a teenage girl wearing a brilliant red cape. Most
unusual though was that the girl was looking right at her. They made eye
contact as the light changed. The girl
pointed with her chin over her shoulder, spun around and left; her cape billowed
behind her as people blindly shuffled to allow her to pass through.
Lizzie
elbowed her way to the front of the crowd, eyes scanning the limited routes. A flash of red flickered at the edge of an
alley, and without allowing herself to consider her motives, Lizzie trailed
it. This alley was noticeably quieter
and calmer. The masses of people
continued down the main road. Up ahead
the girl looked back over her shoulder, gave a mischievous wink, and let
herself through a gate.
Lizzie was
sure the gate hadn’t been there yesterday.
She would’ve sworn this was a dead end. She looked behind her, giving a moment’s
thought to the safe and responsible option of continuing on to work. She dismissed it instantly.
On closer
inspection, Lizzie decided the gate had been there forever, she’d simply missed
it. It was ancient, yet opened smoothly
when she pushed through it. She heard
the latch click behind her and turned to look back, relieved that everything
was exactly as she’d expect to see and then amused at herself for considering
anything else. But when she faced
forward, her world had changed. The girl
still stood waiting for her, but no longer was she standing in a city alley
with office buildings on either side of her; in front of her lay something from
a storybook – rolling hills of green, trees off to one side, and a castle in
the distance. A frantic look back
revealed the city Lizzie knew, and she reached backward for the gate. The cold metal in her hand was reassuring,
but as she opened it, she felt an almost overwhelming sense of loss. She allowed the gate to close again which
dulled the sensation significantly, but her fingers turned white with the
intensity of the grip she kept.
“What…? Where…?” usually articulate, she found
herself unable to formulate a question that would address the situation she
found herself in.
A bird calling in the distance was the only
answer she received. It was not a city
bird she heard.
Lizzie’s
feet felt rooted in cement. She could
not go forward if she wished, but nor was she inclined to tolerate the intense
misery of the gate. The other girl’s
hands were interlaced in front of her while she stood quietly. Her eyes shone of wisdom and experience well
beyond what her age should allow.
“Who are you?” Lizzie’s words came out barely
more than a whisper.
“I was once
as you are now. I made my choice; now you
must make yours.” Her melodic voice had
a hypnotic tone to it that suited the look in her eyes but not her youth.
“How did that work out for you?”
The girl’s
eyes crinkled as she let out a short laugh that instantly set Lizzie at ease. The woman-girl paused for a moment, looking
away from Lizzie before answering.
“My choice
had consequences,” she spoke slowly, as though considering each word. “Some were very hard,” she gave a gentle
laugh, making Lizzie wonder how much time had passed that such hard results could
now have happy memories. Lizzie waited
for her to continue, but the girl had her lips pressed tightly together.
She phrased her next question carefully.
“If you
were to do it again, knowing what you know now, would you make the same choice
you did?”
The girl
gave the smallest of nods before speaking, “Yes I would, but realize I did not
face the same choice you have in front of you.
Your choice is your own, but if you wait much longer to decide, you’re
going to be late for work.”
The reality
check startled Lizzie. What was she
doing? She had to get to work. She needed that job. She opened the gate and felt the sense of
loss wash over her. Her feet were still
unwilling to move. Reaching into her
purse she smiled; she never missed a day so nobody would care as long as she
called in – and given that she was seeing fantasy countries in a dead-end
alley, she was clearly in need of a mental health day.
Her relief at the simple solution disappeared instantly
when she discovered she had no service.
“Really?”
her guide rolled her eyes, suddenly seeming entirely like the teenager she
appeared to be.
So go to
work like a responsible adult or play hooky for a little while? That was the decision Lizzie tried to
rationalize, but she knew in the part of her soul that’s reserved only for
truth, that the choice she had to make would be immeasurably more significant
than that.
She closed
her eyes, took a deep breath, thought about everybody important in her life,
and realized that every one of them would understand that she needed to make
the choice they never would.
So with fear and excitement warring for control over her emotions, she let go of the gate and walked towards her next adventure.
So with fear and excitement warring for control over her emotions, she let go of the gate and walked towards her next adventure.
